Ten Ways to Feel Instantly Fabulous

1. Feathers.

Obviously most women can't pull of a boa in broad daylight, but I make them work when possible. Like on the ends of ink pens and these fabulous peacock earrings that I got from Urban Outfitters.

2. Animal Print.

Not fur, but animal print. It makes things instantly sexier. I'm an interior designer, and I love throwing in animal print where you'd least expect it (leopard print staircases), It's also fabulous to wear it where it's a secret. I have about ten pair of animal print underwear.

3. Perfume.

I make most of my own perfume, by mixing perfume oils. There is no more fabulous way to store it than in vintage crystal perfume bottles.

4. Pearls.

All fabulous women wear pearls, end of story.

5. Vintage Crystal Headbands.

Ok, the real answer here is a tiara... but that usually only works if you have an excuse (like your birthday, your bachelorette party, and maybe New Years). So, instead I love vintage crystal headbands.

6. Glitter and Sparkle.

Again, a FINE LINE between Halloween and making this work. I save it mostly for evening... sequined clutches, FINE body glitter (you aren't 13), and sparkly earrings.

7. Champagne.

I know a nice glass of wine is good and relaxing, but we're talking about being FABULOUS here. Champagne is necessary. Get yourself some cute glasses to drink it from and some gourmet chocolates, and voila!

8. Petit fours.

Cupcakes are cute, but petit fours are fabulous. Don't believe me... make the switch. Something about cute mini cakes in adorable little boxes... instant fab. Olivia and I's favorite treat!

9. Bubble Baths.

But not JUST bubble baths. You must have fabulous bath products. My favorites are Carol's Daughter and Dirty Girl products.

10.Stilettos.

Surprise! I know... but there's just something about them. They make even the most mundane tasks totally glam... like doing the dishes. And I have NEVER had a boyfriend complain about me dusting in boy shorts and stilletos.

For The Ladies

Follow Friday

As the hours get late on Thursday, I realize that tomorrow is Friday.... Oh, but not just Friday.... It's Follow Friday .... better known as #followfriday. Yes, I'm a Twitter addict.

When I first started Twitter, I loooved #followfriday. I met lots of new and interesting people and my follower count grew exponentially. Then I would spend the next week getting to know those new people who in turn introduced me to new and exciting people the next Friday.

Then something changed. Maybe it was Ashton or Oprah or God knows what else that we could blame it on, but something happened to #followfriday. It happened over the course of the past month and a half. I have yet to put my finger on what happened, but it's just not the same.

Maybe it's me.... maybe the novelty wore off... but no, because I'm not the only person who feels this way. I have friends who WON'T twitter on Friday anymore... just because of #followfriday.

It totally consumes Twitter. There is no regular Twitter on Friday anymore.

Everyone is suggesting and suggesting and suggesting and nobody is following. Sure, your follower count grows a little, but not like it did before. Everyone is too busy talking and nobody is listening. I think there are two main issues.

1. I think that there is an overwhelming sense of guilt among people. Everyone is too worried that somebody is going to get their feelings hurt if you don't recommend them. To the point that we are recommending almost EVERYONE who follows us. That doesn't work.

2. I think at the same time, everyone is out for themselves. The constant RTs are killing me. People are RTing every Tweet they see their name in.... in turn, recommending people they probably don't even follow!!! How are you gonna recommend somebody you don't even follow??

Anyway... I'm no expert... I don't know what to do to fix it. I brought this up on Twitter last Friday and got a lot of good responses. I asked what can we do to make #followfriday better. Here are some of the answers I got....

1. Follow People.

The Point of #followfriday is not to gain followers... it is to meet new people. With the way Twitter has been putting everybody in the slammer this week, you should be locked out for at least one hour tomorrow. Use this time to follow interesting people and not to tweet.

2. Write Recommendations.

Instead of writing a list of people to follow that looks like this:

#followfriday @Hail_Mary_Jane @LordLike @Aftashok @SKORPIOLOVE @girlrokkstarr @jawar @BossTycoonLZ @IamMrBloom @PrincessPayne

Try writing one like this: #followfriday @Hail_Mary_Jane He's one of the funniest guys on Twitter and one of the first people I followed. He runs a great site on sports news, urban trends and marijuana news.

Give them a reason to follow the person that you are suggesting. It's two-fold. It tells the person you are recommending what you value about them, and it helps make your tweet stand out among the lists of names. They are more likely to be followed this way.

3. Sort.

If you don't feel like you have time to write about each person, at least categorize the people you are recommending. Try grouping them by things they have in common... like music, sports, location, or other common interests. i.e.

#followfriday MOMMYS: @BishImmaStar @WildFlowerSweet @HildaG420 @IdkDivas @MissJo_Jo @DaYziEbAbY

4. Follow One.

For every tweet that lists your name, follow one new person from that list. It's that simple... just a little rule to keep you following new people.... and to make the cycle keep happening so that everybody grows.

5. Clusters.

This will be something new that I am trying tomorrow. I will be Tweeting individuals directly, and recommending that they follow specific people that I think they would truly enjoy. I.e.

@StraitJigg #followfriday Did you know that @Aftahok @IamMrBloom @NolaUptowner @JaySkillz and @NewOrleans7 are all Louisiana people too??? Follow Them

Granted, its a little more aggressive of a tactic... but I'm gonna try it.

Anyway... Comments are open, let's see what we can do to fix this shit.

Twitter County Jail

5 Leading Ladies

1. Sophia Loren - "If you haven't cried, your eyes can't be beautiful. "

2. Marilyn Monroe - "I don't know who invented high heels, but all women owe him a lot."

3. Coco Chanel - “A women who doesn't wear perfume has no future.”

4. Audrey Hepburn - “There are certain shades of limelight that can wreck a girl's complexion”

5. Billie Holiday- "If I don't have friends, then I ain't got nothing."

Top 5 Ways NOT To Handle a Break-Up

5. Stalking.

We get it. We've been together for a couple of years and you know the routine. This does not give you license to show up places where you know I'll be. You didn't play pool at the bar on Wednesdays the whole time we were together, but now your friends just insisted on coming here tonight? Not buying it.

4. Property Destruction.

Oh girl, trust me... I know. You sooo wanna see that stupid project car he spent every fucking Saturday of your relationship working on with it's windshield busted out, it's tires slashed, and SORRY BASTARD keyed into the hood. 28 inch rims don't look good on flat, do they bitch??? Still... not worth it. The legal repercussions are too much to consider this option. Nobody else could have done it, and one of his friends WILL lie and say they saw you do it. Don't.

3. Buying 'Em Back With Presents

Or worse... burning them a sappy cd of all the songs that remind you of them. There is nothing more pathetic than finding something on your windshield with an "I miss you" note. Don't buy gifts, don't offer to pay their bills, or give them an engagement ring. Save your money to buy your ass some dignity.

2. Private Calls

I never got a private call before we broke up, and now I get six per day. I wonder who it could be? It's not a bill collector heavy breathing in the phone at 2 am. Again, charges can be pressed... or she'll end up changing her number and then you can't even call her if you REALLY do need her. Move along.

1. Faking a Pregnancy.

Bitch, please. You had unprotected sex for two years without getting knocked up by this guy and three days after your break-up you "think you're pregnant" You are the reason women get a bad rap. Kill yourself.... before you have to make up another lie about having a miscarriage or and abortion.

Silent Treatment

Apparently I'm getting the silent treatment at work today from this guy. I'm pretty damn sure that I didn't do anything. Last time I saw him was Saturday, and all was fine... but first thing this morning... silent treatment. For a minute I sat, racking my brain wondering what I could possibly have done.

I came to the conclusion that it didn't matter if I've done anything or not. This guy is an idiot. I have yet to see him handle a conflict in a positive manner. He's a hot-head... he flies of the handle about every little thing. He's always threatening to quit. He got in a screaming match with another employee just last month.

How do some people end up with such a lack of coping skills? How do you end up 38 years old and giving someone the silent treatment? What's next??? Will he be passing messages through other co-workers? I can see it now "Luke, will you please ask Kat if she's done with the cost book?"

Grrr.... I can handle a lot of things (losing my little sister, father, house and car to a hurricane, career and relationship all within six months) but immaturity I have a hard time with. How do I respond? My immature inner child tells me to give him the silent treatment too. The boss in me reminds me that I am his boss and that I could reprimand this behavior.

The reality is he doesn't respect me because I'm younger than him. I've been dealing with this problem in management for ten years now, and somehow I'm still always younger than the people who work for me. The hot-head in ME wants to remind him that I have more formal education, management experience, and job experience in this field than he does.... but, instead I decide that our actions speak for themselves, respectively.

His review will be here soon enough and the weight of my opinion in this company will speak for itself then. So, I'm going to be mature and wait this one out.... but that doesn't mean I won't be daydreaming about putting thumb tacks in his chair.

Lima Beans & 5 Other Reasons to Be Single

I am adjusting to being single. I haven't been single in ... well, eight years. As I sat staring into my cabinets tonight, it struck me. I can have whatever I want for dinner. I don't have to worry about what anybody else wants. So, I decided that I would eat lima beans and nothing else for dinner. I love lima beans and I haven't eaten them in probably two years. The last trip to the grocery store I bought lima beans intending to force Olivia to eat them, but no... this was a better use of them. I celebrated. I threw them in with a little butter, some evoo, chicken buillon, salt and pepper... and I ate the whole bowl. Then I got to thinking.... what other benefits are there to being single?? I used my Twitter family as a sounding board... and suddenly.... single ain't lookin' so bad....

1. You get the whole bed to yourself... and all the pillows too. I'll admit, the first few nights in the bed alone are lonely.... but the first time you come home dead-ass tired and collapse in the middle of the bed, sprawled out and fall fast asleep.... the grass starts to look a little greener.

2. Nobody else is gonna eat the last piece of cake..... or drink the last Coke... or use the last of the toilet paper.... You can leave something somewhere... and it's gonna be right there when you come back. No notes, no reminding them it's for the birthday party at work. Your fridge, and everything else in your house belongs solely to you again.


3. Time with your friends. Hell, time for anything you wanna do with your time. Let's face it... relationships are time killers. They take a signifcant, ridiculous amount of time. Now... I plan on having drinks with friends, working out, playing with Olivia more, hell.... maybe I'll even learn another language.

4. Money. The reality is, single people live cheaper. You aren't responsible for anyone else's mess....you don't have to buy Christmas or birthday presents for them or their family....their credit and late bills don't effect you....you get out of spending money on Valentine's day... save it or pamper yourself with it.. either way, you're coming out ahead.

5. You don't have to answer the phone. Go ahead, hit decline. And what's better than that?? You don't owe them an explanation either. You aren't accountable to anyone. Welcome to freedom. I am single, and I'll do what the fuck I want... thank you very much.

Ten Mixtapes I'm Listening to This Week

1. Young Dro - Notorious L.A. Dro

2. Gucci Mane - Writing on The Wall

3. Young Jeezy - Trappin' Ain't Dead

4. Juicy J - Realest in the Game

5. Tapemasters Inc - Codeine Hitz 6

6. T.I. - A Year and A Day

7. Young Buck - Back on My Buck Shit




8. The Future of R&B Volume 26




9. Pleasure P - The Introduction of Marcus Cooper




10. R. Kelly - The Demo Tape







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