Friday, December 11, 2009

8:32

What a difference a few days make.
Still wondering how you kick everyone out of your life,
and three days later they are all back full force.
Men don't take no for an answer very well.


I got flowers from 5xs,
and I might be a fool,
but I think I believe him.
I think THE EX just started a lot of mess.
I think he's jealous of what we have going on.
The more I think,
the more the things THE EX says,
just don't add up.


5xs and I have been having a lot of fun.
Staying up all night talking.
He makes me laugh and I miss that.
he drops everything when I give him
the opportunity to be here.
Things are moving slow with us,
but I think that's best for right now.


Army guy has lost his mind.
I told him not to come over.
I told him I didn't want to see him.
and yet,
He gets in his car and heads this way anyway?!?!
I told him to turn around and not to come.
He didn't like that very much.
Told me he needed to be with me,
That he really wanted to see me.
I still said no.
He said he'd never bother me again.


Fast Forward Two Days


I come home to a two page letter on my front door.
All about how he loves me,
and can't see himself with anyone else.
How he wants me to have his baby
and wants to get married.
I can't do anything but ignore him.
His not taking no for an answer,
is starting to worry me.
We'll see how this plays out.


I had a fun day with Mr. Gin.
Lunch at Wasabi
and a little shopping.
He bought me the cutest boots!
An early Christmas present.
I do like being spoiled,
but the chemistry isn't there...
and I've been honest about this with him.
That there isn't any possibility
of me wanting to be physical with him.
He says that it's fine,
that he just enjoys my company.
*shrugs*
I enjoy his too,
as long as he REALLY isn't expecting more
and doesn't try to flip the script on me later.


Phone call:
Him: Hey. What's up?
Me: Not much, just getting Olivia to bed.
Him: We should hang out soon.
Me: Sure. Whenever.
Him: I'm outside right now.
o_O
Well, come in.... I guess.
Yeah, you guessed it.
The same guy who wants to know
which window is my bedroom window.
I know I make him sound really creepy...
and he is, kinda.
He's a nice enough guy though.
I honestly don't feel in danger.
I just feel like I may need to be more
vocal about not seeing him like that.
He seems to think that we're on track
to start talking on a level that's
not just platonic.
Soooo not the case.


I've spent a lot of time with Olivia's Dad.
Things are good.
He continues to test his boundaries with me,
but we're in the process of developing boundaries.
I've remained firm.
We're becoming really good friends.
We talk about everything.
It's amazing how good of friends you can
become when you take sex off the table.
He's one of my best friends...
and that is going to be a phenomenal thing,
for Olivia.
And when it's all said and done
SHE is what my life is really about.


THE EX remains cut out.
I've taken to forwarding all his attempts
at contact to his new girl.
I broke up with him for a reason.
It's sad to see him do wrong by yet
another girl.
but it reminds me of why I'm done with him.
I know that he loved me as much as he is capable
of loving someone.
He tattooed my name on his arm for Christ's sake,
and he has yet to get it covered up.
I know he isn't over me,
but I have to do my part to STAY being over him.
After today, I don't intend on forwarding anymore texts
to his girl.
I just hope he'll leave me alone.
I thought maybe that doing that would
be a deterrent.
I guess jeopardizing his new relationship isn't
a concern for him.
What more can I do than just ignore him now?


The old, old ex has called and called.
He changed his myspace status to something salty,
directed at me....
He has a girl,
and I don't care how much he misses me,
I don't want to be a part of that mess.
I ran into him yesterday,
leaving from my BD's.
Things were awkward,
I expected him to be more
confrontational.
I escaped without being scolded
for not answering my phone...
or so I thought.
He called from a different number today.
Tricked into talking to him.
Lame.
He interrogated me about not answering my phone.
I just told him I wasn't interested in
keeping in contact and that I had to go.
Hopefully, he'll just drop it.

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